Sunday, 10 May 2009

The McCann Game, shortly out of tricks?

I like to play contract bridge, known simply as bridge.

For us who play it, there are, obviously otherwise we wouldn’t do so, many reasons to love the game, but that is not what this article is about. It’s about how some things are finite and limited by physical realities.

Bridge is a trick-taking card game, 52 cards in total, 4 suits of 13 cards each.

It’s played by 4 people, each with a hand of 13 cards.

In a predetermined order, each player plays one card, and the comparison of those 4 cards determines who wins or loses the trick.

So 13 cards per player means that there are only 13 tricks in each hand played. Not one single more, not one single less.

When it’s over, it’s over.

Another limitation, and Jacques de la Palisse wouldn’t say it better, is that for every trick played, it’s one less that is there able to be played.

It’s an obvious concept but a very, very important one to retain. If you’ve played 10 tricks, there are only 3 left. That’s it, no way around it. And, at that particular point of the game, 40 cards have already been revealed and only 12 are left to be played.

As each player has 3 cards in his hands, and is able see the Dummy’s 3 cards, there are only 6 cards that remain to be seen.

Out of 52. At this point in time these 6 cards hold very little surprise, if any at all. Now, let’s see how many tricks the McCanns have played lately:  

The Malta sighting.

A card played over and over again to the point of saturation. This one was either the last one of its suit or, whatever the next one appears it will get the same attention as this one got: a smirk and a shake of the head.  

The Oprah show.

This was like thinking that you adversary had the ace of trump, but it was only a deuce. And not even a trump at that.

As far as I’m aware, it had no impact whatsoever in favor of the couple. On the contrary, they were completely ridiculed by their own act.

Even Girls Aloud got more attention.

In my opinion, it proved only that Oprah is amongst the list of their friends. Unfortunately for me as I had her in the greatest of considerations, but that’s what I’m deducing by the lack of any action on her part after getting the reactions she got on her site both before and after the show.

At what cost to her credibility, only time, and the Americans; will tell.

The new suspect.

Well, what can be said about this one? I confess I was surprised.

The shamelessness, the sheer gall, the “we-take-you-for-an-idiot” attitude, really surprised me.

I thought they were looking for what they most need: empathy. And they pull out a card like that. That only says that they have very, very few cards remaining and are scraping, desperately, the bottom of the barrel.

Did I hear that now they added a scar to that horrendous face?!? What next, an eye patch and a parrot on the shoulder?  

The C4 “Cutting Edge” documentary.

The most stupid self-incriminating piece of backfiring propaganda that I've ever seen.

Never so much rubbish was joined together in so little time. Who was the idiot that came up with this idea?

We were all invited to a black and tie party, and all we got served was peanuts. And stale ones at that.

The anxiously waited defense from the vilified, who managed, all by themselves, to prove that their vilification is not only adequate as its absolutely righteous. These criminals deserve no less than the most intense of vilifications.

Kate’s “we had left it” confessing that there were no checking of children whatsoever.

The mysterious “wooooosh” draft, later a celebrity on Oprah, who happens to be violent in nature but very volatile in action. The draft that is... on one hand, slams doors and makes curtains fly, but on the other, stays ambushed when patio doors are open.

Almost as if acting only upon cue, for the greatest dramatization effect. So, so Hollywood.

The dim-witted Jane realizing, finally, how contradictory everything she ever said was. Do spare me the crocodile tears, dear.

The most stupid attempt in bringing to “our-side of the story” the Smith sighting, which only comes to confirm that, yes, it was Gerry, and yes, it worries the hell out of the McCanns.

The American actress that vanished. Was she also abducted? By cartoon-man?

And, Oh yes, the cartoon-man. An infamous character straight out of the most dementedly xenophobic of minds, set to be disgusted by the whole of western civilization. Yet, and that’s how humanity sometimes surprises you, got nothing but sympathy from all.

Ugliness, McCanns, is not a sin. Guilt, is. (Gerry, not quite a compliment hearing that he looks like you, is it? Not me saying it... not me saying it... just heard it)

So now, everything boils down to a 12-year old girl’s (which I believe that what she's saying is true) statement that she saw a man staring at the apartment. The identifit on file certainly seems to be human, unlike the cartoon created.

If you want a perfectly logical reason for a man to be staring at the apartment 5A, I’ll give you one upfront. Not stating that it was, just saying that it could’ve well been. He was eyeballing Kate, or at least trying to. She’s an attractive woman, and he was curious to find out where she was staying.

No, not to kidnap or hurt her, but to be able to just check her out more often. Simple as that.

Many a time I’ve been stared at. Sometimes I took it as a compliment, others as annoying, that is exclusively up to each one’s fickleness, but never as a crime, unless it’s stalking.

Which, by all witness accounts, was not the case. BUT, not being one to ignore relevant information let me say that I will certainly take in consideration, as suspicious, the presence of a man staring at the 5A apartment.

But I will do that only AFTER I get reasonable explanations about the broken shutter, about the inexistent shelf where cuddlecat supposedly was but ended up next to the pillow, about the Olympic capabilities of the abductor inside a dark room with a 4-year old in his arms, about…, about…, about so many lies that it’s getting pretty tiresome to list just the most relevant ones.

After you give me a reasonable explanation for all those, then I promise to consider, seriously and wholeheartedly, the suspect number whatever, known as cartoon-man, as a possible abductor.

I’ll even abstain to look at him as the fictional character he is. You scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours. But you scratch mine first.

You can’t, can you? Everybody knows you can’t. You have to have an abductee before you have an abductor So, EVEN IF, cartoon-man was a pedophiliac that was stalking apartment 5A with the intention of kidnapping specifically Maddie, he didn’t do it.

Why? Simply because Maddie was NOT abducted. For Maddie, unfortunately for her, those nearest that should have protected and cared her, got to her first, before any other, imaginary or otherwise, threat.

The second anniversary “festivities” were a flop. The McCanns are clearly playing their last cards.

Their stack is running short. And they haven’t much more to play with. Little surprises expected ahead, at least nothing that I can think of.

Another suspect? It’s been done.

Another sighting? Done that before,

Another documentary? Been there (but, by all means, do repeat).

Another show? Cannot see who can top Oprah.

Lest we forget, for every trick played, it’s one less that is able to be played, and there isn’t much game left, is there, McCanns?


  1. I will read this text only tomorrow,slowly of course with mine or my? portinglês.

    Text. : have a nice time!


    Kate McCann with pleasure explains her daughters abduction.

  3. Good morning Tex, well here is a trick that we should have seen coming. The release of a video showing what great parents they are just before 'Mothering Sunday'

    Another 'Good marketing Ploy'


    They have been busy little bees, also with Portuguese sub titles.


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