Toilet Paper

Back from a short holiday, where I enjoyed the company of dearest of friends. Mostly Brits, and Bill, my American pal who I can count on to make me laugh, even in the most awkward of situations.

I’ve already revealed my passion for bridge. Now I reveal another: golf. And don’t ask me any others I may have, for I may answer, and you may blush…

In a gentleman’s game where Etiquette is a must, there is no other place where a lady is better treated than on a golf course.

On these days, the Maddie affair keeps coming up. The shake of the head seems to be the generic physical demonstration of the shame felt. One of the players placed a very interesting, rhetoric, question, to the group:

"Since when is crap taken seriously? No one, in the UK, who has an IQ slightly above moronic (that excludes you Jane) takes seriously the news that the tabloid print. 

Unless if you want to know about crap. Then you go where crap is better examined and analyzed. 

The fountain of crap-knowledge itself. If a subject gets its relevance ONLY from crappy press, then the issue is, by nature, total crap. 

So why all the fuss about what crap has to say about the Maddie issue? The sightings, the suspects and now, about the patsy? Crap. Nothing but. Have you read it, in the UK, about this anywhere else? Shouldn’t that simple fact PROVE that it’s the most absurd piece of crap that civilization has been able to come up with?"

We all looked at each other in utter silence, before going into head-shaking mode.

Then, Bill, hit the ball right into the nearest pond. Immediately he said:

“Hey, I know a new golf term we could start to use: to “McCann” a ball. 

Y’know, when you know what has happened to it and everybody else also does too, but YOU, regardless of that, state that something else happened to it, and play the stroke all over again as if what you just invented was assumed by ALL as reality... ”