Flack And The Pimpleman

As said before Derek Flack is quite a character.

Reading through his statements is very entertaining. It’s like reading Mr Bean pretending to be Johnny English.

Two individuals that are, for obvious reasons, identical in build and physical appearances but very much opposed in character, efficiency and proficiency.

A lesson to be learned to all those that keep “profiling” people based solely on their looks to determine if they’re either Brits or second rated individuals.

English has style and class although he’s far from being a James Bond but once you introduce Bean you strip away all said qualities and arrive at a Derek Flack.

Also said before, there’s too much to debunk about what Mr Flack has said for just a single post. We’ve already called your attention to both his peculiar memory problem as well as his objectiveness in term of what he effectively does to occupy his time late mornings and early afternoons.

There’s more, so, so much more.

Today we’ll focus on Pimpleman.

Derek Flack is, as we know, the person that has, allegedly, been the closest to Pimpleman. We know that by his own words.

Let’s see what our friend Derek Flack has this to say about the individual he sees:

On Saturday 2007/05/05:
“… he observed an individual (about 1.70 tall, brunet appearing to be of Portuguese nationality, with a one day beard, thick short hair that at the back extended up to a shirt collar and wearing a solid yellow t-shirt) that was standing on a sidewalk corner looking (this being the reason he was suspicious of him) towards the apartment from where MADELINE would later disappear”

And on Sunday 2007/05/06: 
“Asked to characterize this individual, the deponent refers that he would be a Caucasian individual and dark complexion, of medium height, about 1.70 to 1.75 meters tall, appearing to be about 25 to 35 years old.

Wishes to add that the individual in question had quite dark coloured and quite thick hair, not bearing any fringe.

With regard to his clothing, adds that he cannot characterize it in detail, but assesses that he was wearing a light coloured T-shirt, and, possibly, yellow.

The respondent also wishes to clarify having been convinced that he was not one of the many tourists who usually frequent that location, given the respective built and physical appearance.”

Based on Derek Flack’s statement the following photofit was made:

But on that same day and during certainly the same statement on Sunday 2007/05/06 (most certainly after having particularly reflected on such incidences) he concludes that:
“the deponent refers not being certain to be able to recognize him, in case he should be confronted with his presence.”

This is reiterated, 3 days later, in which he surely reflected further on such incidences, on Wednesday 2007/05/09 when he says that:
“although he could not recognize the individual in question in a peremptory way (as, otherwise, had been consigned within the respective inquiry)”
and:
“Still, enhancing that he’s unable to undertake any formal recognition (because reiterates not having able to view in detail the individual in question)”

So, Derek Flack is able to say the following about a person he was not able “to view in detail”:

- he’s a Caucasian individual

- he has a dark complexion / is a brunet appearing to be of Portuguese nationality

- he had a one day beard

- he was about 1.70 tall / he was medium height, about 1.70 to 1.75 meters tall

- he appeared to be about 25 to 35 years old.

- he had thick short hair that at the back extended up to a shirt collar / he had quite dark coloured and quite thick hair, not bearing any fringe.

- he was wearing a solid yellow t-shirt / he was wearing a light coloured T-shirt, possibly, yellow

- he was not one of the many tourists who usually frequent that location, given the respective built and physical appearance.

Can you imagine what he would have been able to tell us if he just had been able to see Pimpleman in detail?

But the question one should ask is: would he really have been able to see what he says he sees?

We know, or so he tells us, that there’s only about a foot of pure clean air between the two, so nothing would be obstructing his view, so why shouldn’t he?

If you look at sequence in the Mockumentary where Flack meets Pimpleman you notice a very interesting thing:

Flack’s observation of the Pimpleman is exactly the time it takes him to take three steps.

That takes about 1,5 seconds.

Now ask yourself the amount of information you can absorb in 1,5 seconds: complexion, hair colour, hair thickness, one day beard, fringes in front, collars at the back, age, height and the clear perception he wasn’t a tourist.

Add this to the fact that your brain is entertaining the thought that you’re finding odd that the man is staring fixedly and obsessively towards a white van that you've also just seen parked up the street behind you and which, for some inexplicable reason, you also decide to take notice of.

That cannot be the same brain that can’t remember which day it registered so much information in only 1,5 seconds, can it?

Mr Bean and Johnny English taking turns in observing and in registering the observed?

The next episode: Flack and the White Van. Others to follow.